Summer 2017

I am back. It has been such a long time since I posted or even reflected about my year. To catch myself up to date and to remind myself of this journey, I’m going to write down my timeline from my last post in August 2015.

Sept 2015 – I got a placement at Hacienda La Puente Unified. Lissa Hokoda (SDC 3-5) and Patty Skaggs (SDC K-2). These were my two placements, learned so much but nothing like what my first year teaching has taught me.

Dec 2015 – I got my credential! I finished my credential program but was finishing up my Masters (spring semester).

Jan 2016 – Mesa Robles had a RSP/SDC position opened. I taught K-8 from January to May. Those were the longest 5 months ever. I learned so much but it was so hard balancing school, work, IEPs, and wedding planning. Jon and I were still long distance and I thought I wouldn’t survive this season of life.

May 2016 – Graduated Biola with credential and Masters in Teaching. I walked a week before my wedding.

June 4th 2016 – Got married! And eventually moved up to Norcal.

Aug 2016 – I started my first year teaching.

I had a SDC 3rd/ 4th combo class and man this year was tough! I was thrown in and it was so different from student teaching. There were tons of tears and doubts. S’s mom would email me mean emails late at night and said I wasn’t doing my job right. She said I was rude to her son and that he can’t be told to apologize.

Despite a rough start, I can look back now (as I am sitting at home for summer break) and say that even though it was tough, it really gave me a great perspective of what teaching is like. Everything was new, and yes, that was very hard to handle because I did not know what the next steps are. I had no way to expect the upcoming events. I literally tried to stay afloat as events, IEPs, situations, behaviors, and curriculum came along. This year has pushed me so hard, and I never worked so hard before (maybe when I did long term teaching at Mesa – according to Jon). I am anxious about this upcoming year. I don’t know if I can do this all again, the fully cycle of Aug-June. It was so draining and tiring.

God give me the strength to become a better teacher this year. Don’t let me to slack off or give up. Give me the strength, patience, love, and care to pour into my upcoming class! Let’s do this 2017-2018!

 

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Anticipation and Excitement

August 19th, 2015

My student teaching & seminar begins next week and I am more than excited to see what God has in store for me this semester. I will be meeting up with my supervisor on Monday and we will be getting to know each other a bit more. She will be working with me, evaluating me, and teaching me this coming fall while I teach and learn through my master teacher. However, one thing that is killing me inside is that I don’t have a placement yet. For some reason, Biola hasn’t gotten back to me about where I will be for my student teaching and which teacher I will be working under. I was notified by the coordinator that she will let me know by early this week, and now it is Wednesday night and I still have not heard back.

Naturally, I am a worry wart so this doesn’t help when student teaching is my last stretch of this program and it is where I will learn the most. I am excited to learn and be back in the classroom after a whole summer but I am also nervous and anxious about how my performance and teaching will be like. What if I mess up, what if I don’t remember any subjects, what if I can’t control my class, or what if I suck at teaching? My old roommate would always say “Fake it till you make it!” Let’s hope I don’t have to fake much this coming semester!!

First Day after Christmas Break

January 5th, 2015

The whole Christmas break I was dreading today because multiple people at the school has come up to me and said something about my student’s behavior going downhill after break. I noticed how frustrated he got and how he would not listen to anyone after Thanksgiving break, and that was only one week. I was scared and stressed to see how my student would be after 2 weeks of break. Throughout my two week break, I dreamt multiple times about my student running off campus, him screaming or being so difficult that I was unable to handle him. Of course, last night as I was lying in bed, I was unable to fall asleep because I was running scenarios of how my student would be like and how I can appropriately and gently respond.

Praise God, this morning my student came in to school with a smile on his face and he was willing to talk to me as we walked to our classroom. Even though this student can really make me doubt myself as a future special education teacher, I was able to receive this rush of patience and love today. I honestly do not know when or how it came about but as I walked along him and just looked at him while we talked, I wanted to care and love him. I was ready for any battle today but I was even more ready to help him learn and become independent. After work, I reflected on how well he behaved today and how much I love him even though he has caused me so much stress these past three months. I realized that this love and patience wasn’t out of my own doing or out of my own ability but it was God who provided for me. There was no way in my humanly flesh and sinful being that I can love someone who screams and yells at me all the time. There was no way I was so patient in answering all his questions and truly caring for him while my voice was giving out because of my cold. As much as my body ached, God gave me the strength to walk around and enjoy the day with my student. God is so good in providing just what I need each day. Every single day I am amazed by how great and wonderful my God is.

New Job, New Memories

Date: September 9th, 2014

Location: Arcadia

Student: 5th grader

Feelings: Excited, uncertain, overwhelmed, enjoying it, tough days.

Basically, my life at work consists of this all the time.. ALL THE TIME:

“Miss Chan, do you know that hedgehogs eat their babies? Chomp, nom nom nom…”

“Are you afraid of dragons? What happens if a dragon comes after you?”

“Did you play Clash of Clans?”

“What type of clouds are those?”

“What happens if 200 barbarians came after you?”

“Did Mario die? What does RIP mean?”

“Can I spend now?”

Cinco de Mayo

At fieldwork, the children were coloring the Mexico flag. Most of the children in this class were Hispanic so many of them were familiar with the flag and the holiday today (May 5th). One student was coloring the flag when he shouted out to me “What color is the Mexican bird?” UHMMMM…. I replied “It’s not a “Mexican bird”, its an eagle and its brown….”

During Mother’s Day crafts with the same students, they were filling out a Happy Mother’s Day form where it asked “What is your mother good at?” or “How does she like to relax?” So as I was reading over some students work, I saw that one young girl wrote “My mother is good at texting.” Oh children, so honest 🙂